every since high school you’ve counted too much on angels when things were bad you’d quietly pray that your angel would take the pain away it never did but you continued to pray and when as one might expect the pain gave way to joy you credited your angel ignoring what you and your friends had done to clear away the darkness perhaps the light of joy blinds us to the real angels in our lives the ones without wings that by no standard could be confused with some angelic form but that are none the less performing miracles that change the path of our future
aunt bea said i have a small jar of gold stars on my office shelf each one represents someone i’ve loved or grew up with when a friend passes on i place their star on a picture of the night sky in my bedroom and though the jar grows empty and my loneliness grows i see the heavens full of stars when i rest my head at night and that gives
these fancy dress shoes have holes in them places where the earth can reach up and touch my soul sometimes the touch is cold reminders of those who hurt me but more often than not the earth is warm a warm embrace from an old lover or friends now buried beneath the places that i walk country roads city streets and places we discussed oh and your home where i walk now dressed in these new shoes that have holes in them places where the earth can reach up
my memory’s reflection seems to have faded in the mirror of time old friends no longer call even old enemies no longer are appalled and i find that i no longer long to be seen could easily be a hermit perhaps i am not on some frigid mountain top god forbid given those itchy wool robes but here in the confines of these four walls wanting no more than meditation and a quiet enclave away from the things i tried to change just another do-gooder fighting windmills feasting on life’s porridge
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she sat carefully analyzing her dreams according to university standards using a dream dictionary she kept on the nightstand just in case she had a meaningful experience at night she began considering the underlying events hoping to unify her body mind and spirit through self-exploration hoping to unlock the latent agents of those dreams maybe arguments with friends lost lovers fears as well as an array of approach-avoidance possibilities only to find a half-eaten piece of pizza beside the bed