so damn tired…

copyright cwmartin 2012

this road
is longer
than i thought
much harder
to climb
than promised
too many hours
spent praying
with nothing
to show
except
some bruised knees
and
empty dreams
all
those
expectations
of what life
would be
are
nothing more
than words
written
on winter’s frosted glass
before
sunrise

i remember some of it…

i remember
longing for those
random expectations
of spring
a new bird’s song
the tip of green
from beneath the snow
how the sound
of boots soften
when crossing the field
or water
moving quickly
carving ice sculptures
along the stream bed
and
I remember
longing for some
random expectations
for peace
though
the spring
arrived
i am still
waiting on
peace

for your convenience…

we have cancelled
all requests for
hope
many of you
have stood in lines
for hours
expecting to be
well
recipients
of the much promised
better days
you know
when
you’ll have
     a good paying job
     a nice home
     low interest rates
     adoring children
     etc.
these expectations
ah
cannot be 
met
nor
did we 
ever believe
that they
could
however
as a conciliation
we are offering you
a belief
in
heaven

 

waiting…

Image by CWMartin 2010

isolated fears
outline
the edge of hope
holding back
expectations
and
dreams
like a dam
ready to burst
but no one
hears
the roar
of desperation
flowing rapidly
outside their doors
they’re
too busy
talking about
how their
prayers go
unanswered
so they drown
in their own misery
while waiting
for what
has come
and gone

deimos inn…

Final Challenge Image from Jade

  

with the lights on
there is nothing to fear
this is just another hotel room
a place for
an itinerate soul to visit
everything seems in place
but
when the lights are off
this place becomes a prison
nothing is where it’s supposed to be
the floor
is quicksand beneath my feet
the door has bars of anger
holding back my freedom
my thoughts rattle
around the room
seeking a familiar corner
the air is foul
and
stale with formality
my misery
has no place to hide
it cannot find
a warm spot to rest
so it paces
back and forth
in my mind
refusing to rest
until the dawn
when i release it outside
where it can run away from me
and swing in the trees
with childish expectations
but it is hours
before dawn
so i sit alone
with the lights
on

This poem represents my last response to  the second challenge series between Jade and I.  As you may recall, each poet provides the other with a series of photos, visual prompts,  from which the poet is to write a poem.  Jade has written her response which can be found here

notwithstanding in this rejoice not…

enter these hallowed chambers
light a candle of pure hope
to push back the darkness of despair
press your hands together
grasping onto the frayed fibers of your faith
kneeling in the silence of your expectations
offer up your prayers
before the altar of tomorrow
but
not even prayers
said from the heart
nor wishes
cast with golden coins
into the fountain of belief
can bring life
to a stubborn soul
who sees the world’s sadness
as too much to bear
and so stays
within its shell
or dies before the dawn
as if to say
i’ve changed my mind
so cry
if you must
but understand
this
not all that is good
is born