although death had not scheduled an appointment it arrived none the less complains about premature and unexpected were notoriously ignored most folks know death rarely sends out notices requesting répondez s’il vous plaît since most would never reply anyway
the brown bag prophet said given the current list of plagues and school board meetings resembling the spanish inquisition i fully expect that we’ll soon have the great teachers witch trials complete with teachers firmly tied to tetherball poles surrounded by a stack of burning banned books books banned for their revealing the truth about our illustrious forefathers you know the ones that massacred native americans and enslaved others for purely selfish reasons their own financial gain and unfettered power lord knows we can’t have children knowing the truth such truths might hurt their mental status making them feel guilty and limiting how many of them that will be willing to commit similiar crimes in the future and then where would we be
this is the sale
you’ve
been waiting for
gonna have
some
nice stuff
lots of
silverware
and
plates
fine antiques
used
by
our
founding fathers
and
boxes
upon
boxes
of
top secret documents
for
you’re
viewing
pleasure
we’ve been
assured
that none
of
these
classified files
have ever
been seen
by
human eyes
secrets
that could make
you
a martyr
in
any number
of
foreign nations
so
don’t delay
head on down
to
florida
and
sort
through
these one of a kind
items
all sales
are
final
and
cash only
foreign agents
are
welcomed
let it be known
that
states
hereafter
referred to
as
prosecutors
the prosecutor
who imposes
their
moral and religious
values
on another living being
hereafter
referred to
as
plaintiffs
plaintiffs
born
and
unborn
let it be known
that
the prosecutors
herefor
accept
all
responsibilities
for
their decisions
and
accept
the lifetime
financial responsibility
for
said plaintiffs
including
but
not limited to
health and medical expenses
housing
as well as
educational expenditures
both
public and private
further
plaintiffs
must be granted
a stipend
equal to
but
not less than
the average income
of
territorial residents
failure
to provide
these
modest accommodations
would constitute
an infraction
of
the 14th amendment
reinstituting
slavery
to
an already oppressed
class
of
the nation’s population
let me get this straight you’re voting for grave robbers those stealing pennies from eyes of mass grave victims and would rob a dying man my warning don’t close your eyes
the lawsuit
argued
before
the supreme court
was
since children
might
have negative feelings
all history
must be
banned
furthermore
since
literature books
might
contain references
to which
a parent
might
find offensive
all
literature books
must be
banned
education
must
focus only
on the three rs
reading
technical manuals
with
no human representation
wouldn’t want
to imply
any race concepts
writing
business reports
again without mention
of
human representation
and of course
rithmetic
without using
any human representation
all other courses
should be taught
at home
parents
whose children
fail
the government
home educational assessment
should be imprisoned
and
their children
placed
in a federal reeducation center
in addition
all extracurricular activities
such as
band
sports programs
drama performances
should be
banned
since
at least
one
parent finds
such activities
offensive
thus providing
the perfect
educational program
for
providing for
the upper
one percent
girl have you noticed that white folks who feel insecure start going to counseling as children and keep going right up to their death bed but some black child who tries to commit suicide is given seven days in some overcrowded and understaffed county hospital now i know that biblical seven day story so are those folks saying they’re gods
today’s mail letter from an attorney about estate planning cute card with my old university’s logo and a request on the other side to consider a bequest to enhance campus life and a charming looking pamphlet about the benefits of cremation all and all a fine day to remind yourself to enjoy life