by River Urke and charles wm. martin
a life
a mere
drop in the bucket
of time
but to me
she was life
my life
swallowed whole
by the industry
she bled for
now she floats
barren in the universe
a token
of corporate greed
“may we pray for you”
a life
a mere moment in time
he joined for life
the gang to live
now she
was the price
of membership
a one-way ticket
but could he?
he has to
or he dies
his mama dies
Why?
“may we pray for you”
River Urke and I have entered into a duel poetry challenge and this is the resulting poem. Duel Poetry: a prearranged poetry writing challenge between two people to evolve a new poem where each writer must respond to the other writer’s lines (4 -5 ) until both parties agree that the poem is complete
Nice work. You say that you are allowed to write 4-5 lines before the other responds? I have done this where each person gets one line before the other responds and it is difficult, sometimes great, sometimes awful!
How well you have both done this one!! Really, so smooth.. I didn’t even feel like 2 people have written it!! TOO GOOD!!
“now she floats
barren in the universe” — such a poignant and intense set of lines.. WOW!!
Life on the streets, stranded between gangs… lost forever..
GOSH!! How tough it must be!
Well written, C and R… Kudos to both of you!!
Very nice poem…I especially liked:
“a life
a mere
drop in the bucket
of time
but to me
she was life
my life”
Very nice indeed.
Brilliant, Charles, but this one makes me ache, my friend—–
this is painful charles.
the thursday posts are up, if you want to check them-
http://earthinbw.wordpress.com/2011/02/24/starvation/
and
http://etherealheights.wordpress.com/2011/02/24/shangri-la/
all your poems echo the words which this blog is trying to say.
thanks for joining us- its an honour to us.
Hi Charles, just popping in to say that I will read all your latest poems over the weekend, when I can do them justice with the leisurely read they deserve. xxx
amazing message…
it is a hit to hard reality.
cheers.
I think this is my favorite duel poem that you two have done so far. Bravo!
As always Charles, excellent
What a beautiful collaboration – seamless and heartbreaking.
Linking to Trisha’s “Earth and Black and White” blog, my contribution:
Emnity
a life,amere drop in the bucket of time……excellent……
Pingback: Thursday Blog 24.2.11 | Earth in black and white
I loved this bit slp…
a life
a mere
drop in the bucket
of time
Love and hugs my friend. Lisa. xx 🙂
beautiful write on the consequences on un-thought-out choices.
“she was the price of membership” — chilling. The more so because it’s real somewhere.
really a mesmerisin N hard touchin poem sir…
Really so sweet N emotional..
Luv it a lot…
Please check mine too sir…
i hav resumed my writing sir…
My thoughts for this one still swirling around in my head, the price of love, different for all of us
Yes. This is real life for someone, even as e speak. In dying, she dies. In living, he still dies. Definitely a no win situation, for everyone, even the observer. Interesting!