by Toni Loretta Alice Cross
and
charles wm. martin
those eyes
where hope
can find no refuge
stare across the bay
at a camera laden ship
glistening like a overlord’s castle
whose lies
slip like soap
in a deluge
from this shiny, shiny fray
using crisp bills as a whip
making native flesh their vassal
it has been the same
year after year
they come to these shores
pockets full of cash
cameras ready to flash
capturing empty frames of life
Toni Loretta Alice Cross and I have entered into a duel poetry challenge and this is the resulting poem. Duel Poetry: a prearranged poetry writing challenge between two people to evolve a new poem where each writer must respond to the other writer’s lines (4 -5 ) until both parties agree that the poem is complete
Read Between the Minds 
there are some amazing images here. I particularly like ‘lies/slip like soap/in a deluge’ and ‘capturing empty frames of life’ (I assume that’s a typo in empy)
“it has been the same
year after year
they come to these shores
pockets full of cash
cameras ready to flash
capturing empy frames of life”
For some reason these words made me think of Louisiana after Hurricane Katrina…a very powerful poem.
Two views one looking out and the other looking in. Tourists are such voyeurs. What do they experience???
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stark reality. its the truth in so many places.
Interesting poem – it reminded me of both cruise ship tourists and slave owners centuries ago.
Quite clever use of contrasts; the modern currencies like the crisp bills and cameras juxtaposed with the wrecked dignity of what once was.
love the “whose lies, slip like soap, in a deluge” lines…
they just slip off the tongue when said outloud… and conjure up such vivid images.
nice one.
The last three lines of this hit home. Very well written. Excellent message.
What a great idea to play off another’s lines to complete a poem. I loved it–you both did a wonderful job–very descriptive, filled with imagery.
“using crisp bills as a whip
making native flesh their vassal”
often with such subtlety – as condescension.
gripping images……
*Empty*, a little typo above.
Don’t know how we all missed that….thanks!
“from this shiny, shiny fray
using crisp bills as a whip”
-wow
You two work well together. An interesting idea to communicate within the poem rather than comment after.
Slavery by any other name ….
Bravo… a fine collaboration.
in my heart — I think that’s why I don’t like being a tourist.
Powerful words